By Dennis Box, The Courier-Herald

The Washington Association of Sheriffs and Police Chiefs has released a statewide report citing a decrease in domestic violence incidents during 2002. The number of domestic violence offenses reported was 38,193, down from 39,233 in 2001. The offenses range from simple assault to rape, robbery and murder.

Pierce County totaled 8,437 domestic violence offenses. The Bonney Lake Police Department reported 106, while the Buckley Police Department had 19, and Sumner 143.

While the numbers for 2003 are not yet compiled, most people directly involved with domestic violence incidents in Bonney Lake and Pierce County reported they felt there would be an increase for the area.

"In Bonney Lake we have incorporated more area so I would anticipate our numbers would be up," Bonney Lake Police Chief Bryan Jeter said. "Domestic violence continues to be a growing issue, particularly as more people move into the area."

Domestic violence is a much broader issue than abuse between a husband and wife. It is generally described as abuse between anyone with an intimate relationship.

"It can be husband against wife, parents against children or children against parents," according to Ardith DeRaad, president and founder of the Alliance Against Domestic Violence. "Sometimes when a father leaves who is a battering, the teenage son takes on what he has been taught. There are many ways to hurt people, sometimes the most demoralizing is being called stupid followed by a bunch of swear words."

DeRaad noted that among the most underreported incidents of domestic violence are men being battered by women. "A man often will not talk about a woman beating him up," DeRaad said. "It's greatly underreported because the men feel they will be called a wuss."

The problem has added complications in the less populated rural areas of Pierce County. "We try not to go in with a single car," Sgt. Jim Kelly of the Pierce County Sheriff's Department Domestic Violence Unit said. "Anytime there is a domestic violence call there's the power control issues going on. That's especially dangerous. But sometimes the areas around Bonney Lake have to be handled alone because there are so few county officers to cover. With so many people moving in, our police staff is not keeping up with the population growth."

Whatever the numbers are, all agree that domestic violence is a difficult problem that defies easy answers or solutions.

"A big piece of dealing with domestic violence is education," Jeter said. "When our officers respond they give resources to people so they can learn and get help. A lot of people just don't know they are victims."

Education and information on where to get help are daily issues for organizations like AADV. The recent case in Gig Harbor, when Tacoma Police Chief David Brame shot himself and his wife, Crystal, shed considerable local light on the subject.

"I know from personal experience whenever Crystal Brame is discussed on the radio or TV our switchboard lights up," DeRaad said. "The case got people talking and if it did nothing else it raised awareness."

Domestic violence comes in many forms, both physical and psychological, destroying self-confidence and trapping people in a spiraling snake dance. "It's about unequal relationships," DeRaad said. "One person uses intimidation and often time isolation to gain power. In isolated areas like in east Pierce County there is nobody to call the cops because there's nobody to hear."

DeRaad stated there is evidence that domestic violence follows family lines. A woman sees her mother being powerless and abused by her father, then marries an abuser. Or a son watches his father abusing his mother and becomes an abusive spouse.

At times without the proper help and intervention of the police, the endgame can be a final power play with the worst results. "The controllers will keep upping the ante," DeRaad said. "That's why 75 percent of the homicides happen after the woman leaves."

More information about domestic violence can be found on the east Pierce County Alliance Against Domestic Violence Web site at www.aadv.org.

Dennis Box can be reached at dbox@courierherald.com